Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
