I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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