no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
