He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize