Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
