OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
