I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
