Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
