You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
