I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
