Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
