I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
