things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
COCAINE IS GR8
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
