ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
