I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
