So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Randomize
