I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Randomize
