I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
