Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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