she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize