I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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