My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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