Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
