I can't breathe out the right side of my face
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
