i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
