I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
We left an ass print on the piano.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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