i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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