i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize