i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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