Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Randomize
