im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I want to stick my p in your. b.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
