I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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