Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
