I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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