Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
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