she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
