I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Im part way to drunk.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
