sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
