I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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