did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
