I think i sorta joined a cult last night
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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