i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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