I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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