he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Randomize
