I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
no, he came in my armpit
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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