Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Less talking, more tequila
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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