the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
