Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
