thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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