shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Randomize
